Incentive
by Grool
Summary: Definition: Something, such as the fear of punishment or the expectation of reward, that induces action or motivates effort. Just what had forced them to change into someone they hadn't expected to become?
1. Chapter 1

I am set for another story of a different anime. I'd like to try Alice Academy this time. I am very fond of Mikan and Natsume. Their playful bickers never fail to amuse me. I hope you'll support it just as you support my two Prince of Tennis fan fictions.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Gakuen Alice.

**Warnings:** Major characters being OOCs. Story not beta-read.

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**Incentive**

**Chapter One**

_**By Mindshrewed **_

"_I'll make you fall in love with me. When that happens, Natsume, you're going to regret everything you said. Because you're going to love this girl. This stupid, useless girl." Shouted a cheery little girl who, instead of getting angry, grinned at the young boy who insulted her just a moment ago._

_Hearing what she had said, the students gathered at the cafeteria started laughing; some snickered at their seats as they whispered how pathetic Mikan's outburst was. Other girls who happened to be fans of the raven haired boy glared at her with disgust. This made Natsume even more annoyed. He hated public attention. Angrily, he stood up from his occupied chair and walked away without a word. Ruka Nogi, his best friend, followed with a rabbit locked in his arms, all the while throwing Mikan a worried, sympathetic look. He knew the actions of Mikan irritated the Fire Alice owner, and he was sure that Mikan would once again be bullied by the Natsume-Ruka fan club members. Despite the worry and all, he was curious about one thing: Why does Mikan of all people have so much effect on Natsume? Impromptu confessions coming from girls in their school were never new to them, especially to Natsume. He always got them wherever he went, so what was with Mikan's that sent him to being temperamental? He was cold and distant, yes, but he was never always a short fuse._

_Ruka shook his head. They had exited the canteen now, but what happened inside it stayed inside his head as he and his best friend walked along the hallways. He looked at Natsume and saw that the latter still had that sour expression in his handsome features. Even though he had known Natsume for a very long time, Ruka had sometimes been caught surprised with Natsume's personality. The black cat was never easily irked unless the ones he loved and valued are---_

_Wait a minute! The animal lover stopped on his tracks, letting Natsume to lead the walking. The questions Ruka had in his mind earlier, he finally found the answer. And it was obviously a simple one. A smile curved on Ruka's lips as he realized the simplicity of the matter. _

'_If I can analyze it, I'm sure Natsume can too.' Ruka thought to himself. He didn't notice that Natsume had, stopped walking, for he probably noticed that his companion wasn't with him anymore._

"_Oi, Ruka. You coming?" Natsume asked him. "Huh? Yeah, I'm coming." Ruka uttered and advanced towards his friend until he was beside Natsume. Ruka's smile still present on his face, they started walking again. _

_Natsume caught Ruka glimpse at him and asked, "Something wrong?"_

"_Nothing, Natsume." Shaking his head, Ruka replied._

_Honestly, Ruka wanted to talk about what happened in the cafeteria, but he didn't want to ruin Natsume's mood again. The last thing he wanted to see was the wrath of the black cat. When they reached their classroom, everyone paved way as the two three-star students made their way to their assigned seats. No one dared to talk though some were very curious about the scenario at the canteen. They were afraid that the Fire Alice manipulator would set fire on them if they hit the wrong button._

_As usual, Natsume took out his manga while Ruka just sat beside him quietly. The latter's mind was filled with worried thoughts for Natsume. 'I hope Natsume figures himself out soon. Although patience is a virtue, not everyone can wait for a very long time.'_

_Mentally exhausted, Ruka sighed and looked at the clock above the door. The time said 9:23 in the morning. Their next class was ten. They arrived too early._

_---_

_At the cafeteria._

_Carrying her meal, Mikan looked everywhere for a place to sit in. Her neck was near to almost breaking when she saw a table occupied by only one student. Recognizing who the student was, she immediately ran towards the table._

"_Hotaru! Hotaru!" Mikan cheerfully shouted as she made a run for her best friend, only to be greeted back by the genius's infamous Baka Gun which sent the screaming Mikan few feet away from Hotaru and her food being wasted._

"_Ouch! I really have to get that thing from Hotaru." Wincing, Mikan stood up and slowly walked back to the table and sat in front of the inventor. "You're so mean, Hotaru. I don't even know your reason for hurting me all the time." she stated and pouted._

"_Geez, you really are an idiot. So you call telling everyone publicly about your making- Natsume- fall-in-love-with-you voyage nothing?!" Hotaru hissed at her, toning her voice down so they won't attract any attention. Mikan, however, remained silent and slightly bowed her head. "Among the stupid things you had done, the stupidest one was that." Mother-like Hotaru continued as she stared accusingly at Mikan._

"_Well… I just… I didn't know what had gotten into me to say those words, okay? I got upset with his insults. That jerk Natsume always calls me names I couldn't stand hearing." Mikan defended._

"_But you went too far. You foolishly embarrassed yourself and the Hyuuga." Hotaru added, making the brown-haired girl feel guilty for what she did. When Mikan made no attempt to reply or talk back, Hotaru sighed and looked at her with worried eyes which she scarcely showed. She knew that her best friend felt sad every time someone picked on her, especially Natsume. Though Mikan hadn't told her directly, Natsume was special to her one-star buddy. The goofy smile and the outburst earlier were just there to mask how Mikan truly felt._

_Sipping her juice, the ten-year-old inventor noticed the tears that were starting to form at the corner of Mikan's eyes. Hotaru was aware all the crap she just blurted out wasn't helping her dear friend, and she felt a tug of guilt for that._

"_Mikan... Do you want to get another lunch? I'd wait for you until you're finished." Hotaru changed the topic. She didn't want to make the situation more complicated for Mikan. If she did, the latter might have nervous breakdown. Simple math had made Mikan's nose bleed profusely._

_Hearing the gentle suggestion, Mikan tilted up her face where a bright smile was readily plastered. "Thanks but I think I'll eat later. Our class starts at ten, right? We should go. Only five minutes left." Hotaru smiled back. They stood up and left the cafeteria._

_Hotaru Imai knew Mikan Sakura all too well. She knew that the warm smile was just one of her ways to hide her emotions. _

_Indeed, it truly was a selflessly hurtful effort. And this was only the beginning of it._

_---_

Two bodies from different places woke at the same time. Out of the same dream? No one knows. One dreamt of her mostly painful childhood memories. The other dreamt of the chance he had let slip out of his grip when he was younger.

Based from their descriptions, you can't logically say it was a dream. It was more appropriate to call it a nightmare.

Both of them were haunted and were caught up with their past. She felt anger and hatred. He was regretful, yet still hopeful to patch things up with the person he so foolishly pushed away. The only person who had the guts to tell him how she felt about him.

Both sighed.

'_Why do I keep dreaming about my past? I want to freaking forget! They brought me nothing but heartaches and pains."_ Mikan mentally whipped herself as she laid her tired body on her bed.

'_If I hadn't screwed up, would you be here and not have left?' _Natsume thought. As much as he didn't want to admit it, he missed the girl he had always called 'polka dots' before. He smiled, "My polka dots."

**End of Chapter One**

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I think I made big adjustments to each character in this chapter. Well, except Natsume and Ruka. Natsume was still his distant self, and Ruka was still the silent type of guy. Hotaru was unusually talkative in here, but I had let "best friend" instincts take over her. And Mikan—I had always seen her as sixty percent selfless and forty percent outspoken. Well I supposed that it would be fine to make that forty percent of her being outspoken overpower her once in a while.

This chapter was somewhat short, but this was just a prologue. I was just giving you background on the reasons why Mikan became rebellious. Major angst might appear on the proceeding chapters.

That wrapped our first chapter. Hope you'll support me. See you!


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, I know I owe everyone an explanation as to why I had been invisible for over a year (?). I wasn't just sitting pretty, you know. I still have a lot of things to do now that I am currently dealing with one of the most difficult semesters of my course. Anyway, blame the need for education.

Here is the second chapter of this story. Thank you for those who waited patiently for an update. I really do appreciate your kind reviews.

Belated Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, guys!

**Disclaimer: **Gakuen Alice is not mine.

**Warning: **Mikan is OC in this chapter.

**Word Count:** 1,805 words

**Incentive**

**Chapter II**

_**By Mindshrewed**_

"Mikan…" a smooth feminine voice filled the silent corners of Mikan's apartment as soon as she pressed the "Messages" button of the cordless phone's recorder. "… This is Hotaru. Well, you haven't returned any of my calls or messages lately, so for the **nth** time, I'm calling you. We should talk. PLEASE, call me back as soon as you received this." And then a loud "beep" sound from the freaking thing, indicating the end of the message.

Mikan sighed heavily as she put down her shoulder bag and her trench coat on the couch. She leaned down and fished her iPhone from her bag to take a look. There were indeed messages, most of them coming from Hotaru. All saying the same thing. Mikan shut her eyes tightly and gave another heavy sigh. She was too tired for this, and surely, another phone call from Hotaru was the last thing she needed. She didn't think the girl would be this tenacious just to get her to answer to the very least, one of her phone calls or messages. Damn, Hotaru must have missed her terribly to be this persistent. But Mikan knew there was more to it than just wanting to talk to her and have a chitchat of their how have been's for the last couple of years. She massaged her aching temples. Another migraine was probably coming.

From the phone, her eyes moved to the coffee table in the living room and her face exhibited an expression that was half horrified and half annoyed. At the center of the furniture lay a glossy, unwrinkled, unopened envelope. What's the use of opening the damn thing? The writings at the back of the envelope said it all. "Reliving the Memories: Gakuen Alice's Class 2007 Reunited." She sat at the couch next to her stuff and took the thing into her hands.

Mikan wanted to bark at the person who typed the words at the back of the envelope. Whoever did it had to be someone who lacked knowledge of vocabulary. Couldn't they have used the words "In retrospect" or "A look back on" or "Reminiscing the good old days" instead? Didn't they know that the word "reliving" meant to live through an experience, more specifically, a bad one in one's imagination or mind? Out of annoyance and exhaustion, Mikan groaned. Or maybe because it was her, Mikan Sakura, questioning the matter.

Memories of the past hitting her all at once, Mikan didn't notice that she had her left hand clenched so tight her knuckles were already white. Anger evident in her eyes, she snappily scrutinize the back of the envelope once again. But then again, any other choice of words would not enlighten her mood anyway, considering that for the most part, she had little good memories to trace back, few recollections that when she looked back on, she would be overcome with the feeling of nostalgia. So with this, Mikan knew she'd still end up criticizing whatever was written on the paper. And she had only seen the envelope, what more if she'd seen the insides of it.

Mikan took a few moments to calm herself down. Anger ceasing, she shrugged her shoulders as she helped herself into her kitchen to prepare something to eat. The kitchen here in her apartment was not that much compared to her home with her mother, but it had all the kitchen tools and utensils one could need. She loved to bake and cook, after all.

The brunette opened her fridge and decided that she'd make a sandwich out of the pot roast her kind landlady brought her yesterday. Also, she took out the gallon of chocolate chip Häagen Dazs ice cream as her desert. Mikan carried her food to her living area and settled herself down on one of the couches.

Mikan was already done with half of her sandwich when her cordless phone rang again. She let it be; she had a feeling that it would be the same person calling.

"Mikan…" It was Hotaru indeed, but her voice sounds half threateningly this time. "I know you're in there. By Gods, answer the damn phone. I have sent you the invitation to our reunion that will happen next week. You should've received it by now. Call me back, will ya?" And another annoying beep.

Mikan knew that Hotaru was probably pissed off at her big time. Having your calls and messages avoided and unanswered all the time was not something you'd want to experience to someone, especially to a best friend whom you had not seen for a very long time.

But try to understand her situation right now. If this was difficult for Hotaru, imagine the emotional burden Mikan was dealing with right now. You think she wanted to avoid the inventor this much? Oh how she had missed the girl! But she had to forget about that and try to avoid everyone as much as possible, until she figured a way to get herself out of this gathering that promised a lifetime misery.

Obviously, no part of her was willing to come to that reunion. Call her bitter or defensive, she didn't care. She just didn't want to see some people. Well, a person, at least. She wanted to see them (except that person) but she wasn't ready to go and face them yet. Not now. She thought she had been ready, considering that it had been four years since she last saw her former classmates. Four years was a long time, right? Enough for her to forget, to heal, to move on, to pick her shattered confidence and routine of life, and to start all over again. But it looked like it was only the last that she was able to do, the rest, she did not as much as she didn't want to admit it. She really started anew. New home, new school, new friends. Almost everything was new. But she didn't heal, didn't forget nor did she put herself together completely. Maybe, there were just people who were born to remember longer and forget slower than the others. And that's the sad part.

What's even sadder? It was that Mikan Sakura belonged to those pitiful ones. Sometimes she stopped and wondered how the four painstaking years had changed her. Not more than six years ago, she was a jolly little girl who could care less if she looked like an idiot from smiling all day. "I'm a happy idiot," she had told to some. Her bright, lively smile was her best asset after all, and that did not come from her alone. Her mother told her, her beloved Professor Narumi agreed, and Hotaru, and Ruka, and her other friends as well, and even… Natsume.

Mikan suddenly lost her appetite upon remembering that name. She took notice that her half sandwich from earlier remained untouched. With a sad thought in her mind She put the plate down to the coffee table and slumped further on the soft couch.

_ 'So why did he find my smile the most annoying one?'_

Mikan's eyes watered a bit from the memory of the boy. As soon as she realized it, her hand immediately went up to her face and roughly wiped the tears starting to form from them. It still hurt. That's the whole truth. There was no use denying it anymore anyway. She was still pained by everything that had happened in the past. And to save herself from falling apart again, Mikan knew she had to turn down this invitation. As much as she wanted to see Hotaru and her old friends, the feelings of anger, deceit and hatred altogether were stopping her from meeting them.

How were they? After four years, she wanted to see how they looked like. Did Anna still have her hair long? Did Ruka take the course he had been wanting to take since childhood? Did Hotaru change even a single bit? There were so many things that she wanted to ask them, had she communicated with them. But she chose not to. Mikan missed her girl talks with Anna and Permy, her silent but reassuring moments with Hotaru, the advices she had gotten from Inchou whenever she did something troublesome. She missed it all. Despite some bullying experiences, she admitted that life was never the same again after Gakuen Alice. So she stood corrected. There were MANY episodes in her elementary life that were worth keeping. But then again, it all came down to one person to shatter her composure and little amount of stature.

Mikan twitched. There had been this annoying last question inside her head that had been bugging her since she started her reminiscence. And Mikan did not like it one bit. She was really annoyed right now that her vast mind had to formulate such question, albeit against her will, especially when the query involved some person not worth her time remembering.

The angered girl ventured her annoyance towards the used dishes as she cleaned them. It definitely was not in her personality to stay this mad at someone for so long. She used to be so forgiving… so gullible.

She smiled bitterly at the thought. How she had changed through the years. Or rather, how her nightmares had changed her.

_ 'It's still bugging me though…' _Mikan deemed. She gripped the ends of her marbled sink. Unable to hold it any longer, she finally gave in, after battling with herself whether to submit to the query or not.

_ 'After four years, Natsume, do you still find my smile that annoying?' _Her mind freed her.

And after some time, it felt good to allow defeat. Mikan sighed for the nth time, feeling the calm wind touch her face like it knew what she felt. The only witness to her mental admission and solitude.

If there was one thing that did not change in Mikan Sakura was her being a late riser, especially during weekends. She rolled even more on her bed, tucking herself further in her soft pink fluffy blanket. Then there went the stupid doorbell again. The damn thing had been ringing for three times now. She just didn't want to get up. She looked up and saw that the time in her alarm was 7:23. Too early for Mikan Sakura.

When the fourth time came, half annoyed, Mikan reluctantly jumped from her bed and headed for the door. Not caring if she still had her pajamas on or if her hair looked like a bird's nest, she opened the door quite forcibly, ready to snap at the person who dared interrupt her slumber, only to be pushed back into the corners of silence and surprise.

"It took you long to open the door, Baka. Is that the proper way to greet an old friend?"

**End of Chapter 2.**

Mikan is an OC in this chapter, I think. But I like that. Let's stray her away from her true self for a while. I didn't get that many reviews for the chapter one of this story, so I was a bit discouraged to continue. But the good chapters in the manga kept me going. Anyway, I hope you'll read and review. Now that holiday vacations are over, our classes will continue to go on and on; thus, I don't have a summer vacation. Once again, I would probably be on HIATUS during this time. But I'll still try my very best to update once in a while.

Next chapter would be about Natume's POV.

Ciao!


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